Posted: June 17th, 2022
The “Why us ?” and “Why this college?” essay illustrates why you’re a good fit for a specific school using precise details and examples. In some circumstances, the “Why us?” essay is vital for showing interest in a particular college.
The “Why this college?” essay and variations on this topic are among the most often asked supplemental essay questions on the college application.
Here are a few examples of schools that have (or have recently needed) this prompt:
And many other colleges ask the same question as well.
This article will present a step-by-step technique as well as a surfeit of “Why this college?” (also known as “Why us?”) essay examples to help you succeed in your essay and even help you select what type of school you want to join.
We’ll begin by discussing what NOT to do, what facts you SHOULD include in your essay, and where to discover the most excellent resources for researching your “Why this college?” essay.
Mistake #1: Talking about the school’s size, location, reputation, weather, or ranking
Why should you not do this? Because many other students are writing about the same topic, and you don’t want to be among them. Consider Emory University’s “Why us?” prompt, which used to read:
Many students choose Emory University because of its size, location, reputation, and weather. Aside from these valid reasons, what makes Emory University a perfect match for you?
Check out Georgia Tech’s previous prompt:
Why are you interested in Georgia Tech, aside from its rankings, location, and athletics?
Honestly, their admissions readers are sick of hearing about them.
Mistake #2: Relying solely on emotional language to indicate fit.
Telling the school that you went onto campus and “it simply felt right” is a) something many students say and b) does not demonstrate to the reader how you are a good fit for the institution. Neither does the remark, “I can picture myself cheering for the Wildcats at MetLife Stadium on Sundays.”
Mistake #3: Making a mistake with the mascot, stadium, team colors, or names of prominent individuals or locations on campus.
Why not avoid it? It’s the quickest method to demonstrate that you’re a shoddy researcher. In the preceding case, the Wildcats do not play at MetLife Stadium or Sundays. Also, “I can envision myself in [insert school colors here]” is a “Why This College” essay cliché. Avoid it as well.
Mistake #4: Reciting the terminology from brochures or websites.
It’s possible that the words you’re copying and pasting were written by the person reading your essay and judging your application.
“On the one side, it demonstrates that a student has genuinely investigated us, which I admire,” says Warren Wilson College’s Brian Liechti. “On the other hand, as one of the persons who authored the words you’re paraphrasing, I’d like to see proof of how what I said connected with you. Do we share values?” What jumped out to you or spoke to you about that brochure or web page? That’s what I’m hoping to see.”
Mistake #5: Describing the school’s well-known customs.
Learn about the school’s common customs (such as throwing bread on the field at Penn or painting the rock at Northwestern) and then avoid writing about them. Why? Everyone and their brother has already done so. How do you acquire these? Google the school’s name and the word “traditions.”
Mistake #6: Viewing this as merely a “Why them?” essay.
The entire school is aware that it is fantastic. “You probably don’t need to remind us about the lovely Nott Memorial,” Union College’s Nicole Buenzli adds. “I pass the Nott every day; it appears on every brochure we produce, and we all know it has 16 sides!”
Consider this an essay on “Why we are perfect for one other.”
Consider yourself on a date, and the person across you leans in to inquire, “So, why do you like me?” Don’t simply say, “Because you’re hot,” or, “My auntie says a connection with you will help my employment prospects.” Consider this regarding the “us” in “Why us?”
“Us” refers to the College to which you are applying.
“Us” Equals the school plus you.
Make links between the two of you to demonstrate that you and the school can benefit from each other.
Step #1: Conduct your deep research.
I know you are asking yourself how you will conduct the research, worry less; this is how:
“Deep dive” into the school’s webpage. Spend some time perusing the school’s web catalog/course schedule, looking for majors and minors and unique programs, courses, events, and opportunities that distinguish this institution from those you’re considering.
Read expert opinions. Here are a few examples:
The Fiske College Guide (Edward B. Fiske)
Colleges That Make a Difference (Loren Pope)
The 376 Best Colleges (Princeton Review)
Examine student feedback. Students frequently say things that experts do not or will not mention. Genuine student reviews can be found on both Niche.com and Unigo.com. Read a lot to acquire a sense of the campus vibe without being influenced by a few viewpoints.
I particularly appreciate the Unigo question, “What is the stereotype of your school’s students?” and “Does the stereotype hold?” It’s worth noting that if the “stereotype” remarks contradict one another (for example, one scholar says “hippie school,” another “nerdy,” and yet another “jocks and frat men.”), it could be an indication that the institution is highly diverse.
Take both physical and virtual tours. It’s challenging to get to know a campus without visiting it. And if you can, go ahead and do it. If you are unable to visit in person, please see:
TIP: Compare colleges by taking at least five online tours.
Contact the admissions office and, if feasible, your local representative.
Most colleges have representatives for specific parts of the country (and the world). You can communicate with them. They’re also quite lovely! The following are some reasons why this is a good idea:
Pro Tip: Before you call, prepare a few precise questions and avoid asking about anything you can Google in five minutes.
Don’t, for example, inquire whether the school offers a Biology major (spoiler alert: it does!) Instead, ask about how simple it is for non-majors to take advanced musical theater classes or what distinguishes their Engineering program from others (assuming you’ve previously Googled these questions and can’t find the answers).
Don’t be afraid to start a dialogue or be curious. It’s a fantastic method to interact with the rest of the world, even if you’re researching an essay about why you chose this particular College.
Make contact with a current student.
Try asking on social media, “Does anyone know a current or former Purdue student?” Request 15 minutes of that person’s time. Then ask a short series of questions you’ve prepared beforehand. These should be fascinating, specific, and open-ended questions to help you craft your “Why This College” essay.
Don’t just inquire, “How’s everything doing over there?” (too broad) or “Did you enjoy it?” (An open-ended query) Ask open-ended questions that they will enjoy answering, such as, “What was the most mind-blowing class you took, and why?” What shocked you about this College in particular? What are most people unaware of concerning [insert school]?”
The more fascinating your questions, the more attractive your responses, and the more you’ll demonstrate why you’re interested in this College.
THE BEST THREE-WORD TRICK FOR FINDING SPECIFIC INFORMATION FOR YOUR “WHY THIS COLLEGE” ESSAY
Look for a syllabus.
That’s all. Search the depths of Google (or, better yet, ask someone who attends the school) for a syllabus for a class you might take at that school.
Why is this beneficial? Assume you’re trying to explain why you’d take a particular class. What fitter method to do so than to read the wording used by the lecturer in the section of the syllabus titled “What I hope you will learn from this class”?
Consider the following course description, taken from a syllabus written by (and quoted with permission from) Dr. Frank Anderson of the University of Michigan:
This course provides a thorough introduction to the topic of reproductive health, both in the United States and globally. Students will learn about:
Other (more specific) reproductive health subjects will be covered, such as STI care, contraceptive use, pregnancy, maternal morbidity, HIV, abortion care, and violence against women. We will critically explore the logic and impact of current domestic and international standards for reproductive health policy and practice through a comparative examination of reproductive health requirements in various social settings.
You might demonstrate your research abilities by saying in your essay that you discovered a syllabus:
“I was interested in the notion of investigating [Z] in particular when I read Professor [Xcurriculum ] ‘s for her Class in [Y]…”
Step 2: Strategize your research.
What you’re looking for while researching: Reasons specific to the school (i.e., “them”) AND your personal interests and needs (i.e., “you”). Here’s a quick formula:
A (school-related detail) + B (how this relates to you) = a fantastic “Why us?” phrase
Pro Tip: Keep in mind that the “Why This College” essay is another chance to share some of your skills/talents/interests/passions. So, go back over your “Everything I Want Colleges to Know About Me” list and ask yourself: are all of these values/qualities reflected elsewhere in my application? How can I include them in my “Why This College” essay if not?
Step 3: Determine how you will approach the essay.
Important: There is no “optimal” technique, as students from all of these schools are accepted each year.
Here are several possibilities:
APPROACH #1: THE ESSENTIAL ‘WHY THIS COLLEGE’ ESSAY CONTAINS A LOT OF REASONS
It operates as follows: Investigate various opportunities within the school and connect each one to you in an organized manner.
What is the definition of “a bunch?” Try to think of at least 10-15 reasons. While you may not end up naming all of the reasons in your final version, conducting this much research will provide plenty of options when you begin your draft.
What exactly do I mean by “organized”?
Here’s a basic, solid “Why This College” essay outline:
Here’s a sample of a simple, solid “Why This College” Essay with numerous reasons:
Prompt: Describe the unique qualities that attract you to the specific undergraduate College or School (including preferred admission and dual degree programs) to which you are applying at the University of Michigan. How would that curriculum support your interests? (500-word limit)
Mark Twain used to be a steamboat pilot. Agatha Christie was a registered nurse. Robert Frost was a filament changer for light bulbs. The best authors not only write wonderfully, but they also include personal experiences and information from outside the field of literature. I feel the University of Michigan will provide the education I need to advance as a journalist by merging the study of literature, media, and possibly law.
A journalist cannot excel if his understanding of literature and critical thinking abilities are lacking, which is why I’m thrilled to learn more about what the Department of English offers. I’m looking forward to classes like Academic Argumentation and Professional Writing because I believe they’ll provide me with a solid foundation in journalistic writing approach and help me write analytically and generate well-supported arguments. In addition, the Professional Writing course will teach me how to write in a concise, direct manner, which is crucial for a journalist.
I will be able to utilize the abilities taught in class with media studies in and out of the classroom at The College of Literature, Science, and the Arts. The Honors Program allows for independent research into the field of mass media, allowing for intensive group studies and in-depth research opportunities, as well as the opportunity to meet and engage with prominent figures in media-related studies, providing deeper insight and knowledge into the field. Outside of the classroom, I envision myself producing screenplays for WOLV-TV, the student-run television station, or creating headlines for The Michigan Daily.
And while journalism is my present career, I want to be open to new opportunities that may arise at U.M. The Pre-Law Advising Program appeals to me because I want to understand more about the laws and regulations that control our world. I believe that a lawyer’s judicial role is strongly tied to a writer’s expository talents, and I am excited to explore this new subject of study that was not available to me in high school.
But this is what U.M. has to offer me. As a member of the U.M. community, I understand that I will also want to give back. Volunteers Involved Every Week’s many volunteer programs appeal to me, as does the potential of volunteering with the Boys and Girls Club of Southern Michigan, as I have past experience with elementary school teaching. As an international student, I understand the difficulties of pursuing English as a second language. I believe I can add value to the ESL teaching program at U.M. or overseas, and I see this as an opportunity to make a difference not only at U.M. but throughout Washtenaw County and beyond. (466 characters)
Four things why I love about the “Why Michigan” Essay
The brief hook. Many students spend too much time on their opening when a brief one will suffice. The hook for this essay is only 40 words long, but it is effective. Is a hook even necessary for your “Why This College” essay? Nope. If you take the first approach, reach the primary point immediately.
The distinct thesis statement that guides the writing. This will most likely take you back to A.P. English class essays when you’re expected to state your point clearly at the outset and then present evidence to back it up. In a “Why This College” essay, you argue that you and the school are a perfect match.
Per paragraph, there are three primary arguments and three to four pieces of supporting evidence. I propose selecting three primary reasons because a) it organizes your essay, b) it is simple to adjust for varied length “Why this College” essays and c) it gives “buckets” for your research. (“Buckets” are the thematic paragraphs that must be “filled” with research.)
He sprinkles “salt” throughout his writing. Remember how the author stated above that he “look[s] forward to investigating [law] at Michigan, as it was not offered in [his] high school education”? I mean this by putting “salt” into your “Why us?” essay. Why? Consider the following analogy: salt makes one thirsty, and by emphasizing options you haven’t had access to, you’re telling the reader that you’re thirsty for something the school has to give. And the reader may be aware of options for quenching that thirst that you are unaware of, and the word “salt” may prompt them to consider them.
A Slightly More Advanced Application of This Method
Here’s another example that follows the same general framework as the “Why Michigan” essay, but it’s a little more advanced because the specifics are more explicit. As a result, we gain a better understanding of both the school and the author. Read it first, then examine the outline below to see how it’s assembled.
Note: I’ve bolded the school-specific arguments in his essay to make them easier to detect, but you shouldn’t do this in your final edit.
Prompt: How will you explore your intellectual and academic interests at the University of Pennsylvania? Please answer this question given the specific undergraduate school you are applying to. (Word limit: 650)
When I grow up, I want to be a catalyst who inspires growth while also attempting to sustain the environment through increased efficiency. I look forward to majoring in Mechanical Engineering and studying multidisciplinary programs at UPenn because I feel that sustainability can be a feasible answer to preserving the earth’s resources.
At the GRASP laboratory, I hope to cooperate with Professor Katherine Kuchenbecker in the Haptics Lab to develop an integrated haptic-responsive camera trap. In a geologically varied country like India, I feel that the use of teleoperation (in camera traps) in animal censuses and studies has the potential to be a game-changer.
I also believe that haptics interfaces can help accelerate locating and studying previously unknown biodiversity hotspots such as the Western Ghats and the high-rising Himalayas. Aside from that, I would be able to perfect my butterfly stroke through stroke therapy at the Haptics Lab!
Furthermore, hands-on project courses like Machine Design and Manufacturing and Product Design will assist me in developing, prototyping product permutations and testing, and through the ISAC Program 2018, I would like to advocate for an Environmentally Sustainable Product Design course, as I believe that a product’s market longevity is directly related to its environmental sustainability.
I believe that if given the right acceleration, small sparks of innovation can grow into developed businesses, and since I’ve already secured an agreement with the software company Everlution Software Ltd. for my eco-friendly innovation ‘Water Wave,’ I’m excited to use the chances at IGEL to develop my ideas into sustainable technology ventures.
After following my father to joint-venture meetings around Europe, I became interested in specific technical aspects of negotiations, such as the impact of ‘EBITDA,’ the use of inter-cultural body language to shift attitudes, and the lengthy Due Diligence process. Engineering Negotiations courses will help me improve my negotiating skills and develop my thinking in high-pressure settings.
I’m looking forward to contributing in unconventional ways: as part of Penn’s Climate Action 2.0 policy, I’d like to help increase the efficiency of alternative energy machinery through responsive auto-sensors, and I’d also like to help establish wildlife corridors at UPenn by carrying out case studies at the Morris Arboretum with the help of the Penn Green Fund.
I also hope to participate in bird photography and ornithology by being an active member of the Penn Birding Club and possibly conducting fall bird surveys to educate students about the university’s birds. I intend to photograph and document each of UPenn’s 104 bird species (Morris Arboretum Checklist).
Furthermore, courses such as Documentary Strategies and Photographic Thinking will help me better incorporate critical thought into my photographs and create out-of-the-box movies to put environmental sustainability into context at UPenn. In addition, producing picture essays for the Penn Sustainability Review will help me to express the need for change in ways that words cannot.
UPenn will also assist me in pursuing a variety of interests through its many organizations, such as Penn Cricket Club, PennNaatak, where I want to spark my interest in Marathi Drama, and men’s club basketball (I was all-state for three years!).
As I progress toward the global sustainability objective, I am reminded of the UPenn idea of addressing the most difficult challenges and problems of our day by integrating and combining different disciplines and views. I intend to accomplish this during my time at UPenn.
The following is the outline for the “Why UPenn” essay (which you can change for your own):
It’s worth noting that the information in the two essays above is around half about the institution and half about the student, which strikes a wonderful balance. The following is an example essay that follows a similar structure (Thesis followed by primary reasons) but is more about the school and less about the student. This isn’t “wrong,” but rather a slightly different approach.
Prompt: Which aspects of Tufts’ curriculum or
undergraduate experience prompt your application? In short: “Why Tufts?” (200
word limit)
In addition to offering a solid economic basis, Tufts allows me to further investigate global healthcare policy through an International Relations Program that draws on the strengths of 18 allied departments and programs. I’d also like to continue my Chinese language studies at Tufts, working with Professor Mingquan Wang, and possibly studying abroad at Zhejiang University in Hangzhou, China, to get a full immersion experience.
Tufts’ Experimental College piques my interest since I can take unusual classes like Game Strategy (EXP-0029-S) and Rising Tide: Climate Change, Adaptation, and Vulnerability (EXP-0021-F). Furthermore, Tufts’ urban setting allows me to play league cricket all year to prepare for my goal to become the first Jumbo on the U.S. National Cricket Team, whereas studying abroad at Oxford would open doors for me with not only global economic perspectives but also the opportunity to pursue cricket in its birthplace.
When I visited Tufts, my mother’s alma mater, I felt at ease in Singapore. Tufts is the place for me because of its strengths in Chinese, Economics, and International Relations, its lovely suburban campus, academic rigor, and worldwide reach. (196 words)
This is known as the “firehose” strategy since it condenses 14 justifications into 196 words. The author gives the reader the impression that he has clearly done his study and understands how he may use the school’s resources, which is the purpose of the strong, basic “Why This College” essay.
Did you note how simple it would be to change the “Why Tufts” essay for a different university? Replace the word “18” in “18 relevant departments and programs,” change the names of the Chinese professor and university, list two different intriguing courses, and remove the “mother’s alma mater” sentence. You’ve got yourself an essay for another school.
But how do you do to make the school feel truly unique? As an example:
APPROACH #2: THE STRATEGY OF “3-5 UNIQUE REASONS”
How it works: discover 3-5 chances that are unique to the school (i.e., not available at any other school or institution you’re applying to) and connect each one to you.
This is my preferred method because focusing on fewer reasons allows you to convey more about yourself and your hobbies (i.e., “why you”). However, it can be more challenging to write since it can be difficult to identify specifics that distinguish a school from others. However, it is feasible to uncover these unique programs, and I feel it is worthwhile to try, especially for your top-choice school (s).
Pro Tip: Ask admissions representatives what distinguishes their school (or the department you’re applying to) from others.
Consider how the author below cites four distinct offerings that tie him to Cornell (I’ve named them below). Furthermore, we understand a little more about the author’s interests than we did from the previous articles.
Prompt: Students in Arts and Sciences embrace the opportunity to delve into their academic interests, discover new realms of intellectual inquiry, and chart their own path through the College. Tell us why our curriculum’s depth, breadth, and flexibility are ideally suited to exploring the areas of study that excite you. (Word limit: 650)
When I have free time, I connect my EEG to my computer and examine my brain waves. If I feel less daring, I’ll read about the latest neuroscience trends on ScienceDirect or NCBI PubMed. I want to spend my life studying, comprehending, and assisting in the repair of the human brain.
I purchased my EEG for roughly $150 online two years ago and have used it to examine the beneficial benefits of both circadian and non-circadian sleep on the brain by monitoring the number of unambiguous peaks in a 3-minute interval of a theta wave.
However, simply counting the peaks is not the greatest method to assess the benefits. In courses like Principles of Neurophysiology, I’m looking forward to obtaining a greater understanding of the principles of neurophysiology (as well as working with better equipment). As someone who has long been interested in neurotechnology, Cornell’s unique provision of classes devoted specifically to the topic is essential to me.
I’d also like to be able to contribute my neurotechnology experience to Cornell’s fresh new NeuroNex Hub’s cutting-edge research. I’d love to collaborate with Dr. Chris Xu on expanding the current three-photon microscope for different animal models. I’m also looking forward to assisting Dr. Chris Schaffer, whose research on deep brain activity is unique worldwide. I’m terrified of the prospect of assisting him in developing a gadget that can examine several brain areas simultaneously.
Though I had long wished to study at Cornell, my visit and attendance at Neurobiology and Behavior II strengthened my resolve. Professor Christiane Linster’s discussion on synaptic plasticity captivated me completely. Her animations of neurotransmitters passing a synapse and new synapses sprouting in neuron clusters enthralled her students in ways I’ve never seen in other lectures. Because of teachers like her, I want to attend Cornell.
During my visit, I also spoke with Kacey about her experiences with the college scholars program. I was fascinated by her research on the effects of circus and gymnastic shows, such as Cirque Du Soleil, on therapy for children with neurological problems. The thought of merging neuroscience with something like the effects of studying a classical language on young brains excites me.
Many studies have demonstrated the numerous benefits of being bilingual, but little study has been conducted on classical languages. I’ve studied Latin for almost seven years and have seen the benefits firsthand. I spend several hours each day breaking down complex words like those in Vergil’s Aeneid, and I’ve applied this problem-solving technique to other elements of my life, such as my neuroscience studies. This is the program I’d design for my college scholars project.
Cornell is also the only university that provides a Latin-speaking course, Conversational Latin. For the past six years, I have infrequently had to translate more than a few sentences from English to Latin at a time, never completely experiencing the distinctive grammatical qualities of Latin, such as Catullus’ elaborate wordplay in his Odes, that drew me so much to this language.
I’d like to expand my knowledge by being able to express myself in Latin and actively engage myself in the language. I’m particularly looking forward to learning the language the way it was intended to be learned and the unique perspective it will provide me on Latin rhetorical artifacts.
I know Cornell is where I belong as a kid who enjoys innovating, participatory learning and studying a dead language. I’m wondering whether my roommate minds if I bring my EEG?
How this essay relates to the first approach:
What distinguishes this essay: The four examples of how the school is special provide us with a very clear sense of why Cornell is a perfect fit for this student. Also, we know this essay was made particularly for the school because it would be far more difficult (than, for instance, the “Why Tufts” essay) to change the variables and use it for another school. Finally, the “Why Michigan” and “Why UPenn” examples go for breadth, giving many different reasons; the “Why Cornell” example goes for depth, discussing fewer reasons.
APPROACH NUMBER THREE: THE “ONE VALUE” STRATEGY
How it works: choose one key principle that connects you to the institution and share a narrative about it.
This method could be useful for:
Why is this a dangerous strategy?
That’s quite a few ifs! Having stated that, here is an example essay that I believe works:
Prompt: Bowdoin students and alumni often cite world-class
faculty and opportunities for intellectual engagement, the College’s commitment
to the Common Good and the special quality of life on the coast of Maine as
important aspects of the Bowdoin experience. (Word limit: 250)
Please remark on one of the following based on your own interests and experiences:
On the first day of summer, I was in a familiar situation: awkwardly sitting in the rear of a crowded bus full of rambunctious twelve-year-olds. But this time, I wasn’t the bashful, new kid in school, a position I was all too familiar with. I was the instructor, putting into action a middle school aquatic ecology curriculum I’d created the previous year.
As the Passaic River in New Jersey appeared on the horizon, I tightened the red laces on my Merrell hiking boots and checked my luggage for clipboards, lesson materials, and a new water testing kit.
I spent the entire day watching twenty-five young minds test the water of the Passaic River. I educated them on thr pollution and industrialization, urban design, and remediation solutions using the river as a natural learning laboratory.
That summer, I discovered the importance of place through my work in environmental education. In a changing world, I concluded that places are the best storytellers. We traveled the Passaic’s waters by tracing contamination levels, beginning with its use by the Lenape Native Americans, to its wrongful usurpation by European hegemons, to the Vietnam War, during which tons of Agent Orange were recklessly discharged.
This will come up again at Bowdoin. I find myself doing exactly what I was teaching: researching the rich stories surrounding a location. I get lost on Orr’s Island as part of my Earth and Oceanographic Science degree, investigating everything from historical ecology to the changing geology of the Maine coastline. And I can hardly wait.
Why is this essay effective?
This author ticks off a couple of “Why us?” boxes by focusing on a particular, demonstrating his research, and effectively answering the prompt. But do you want to know what makes this article unique?
The author discovered a strong parallel between one of the school’s key ideas and one of his own.
This contradicts the “give a huge number of concrete arguments” for your essay that I suggested in Approach #1. Instead, the author discovered one compelling reason: he and Bowdoin are deeply devoted to researching the location. One emphasis was especially pertinent for this student, who planned to major in Environmental Science. And, when you read this essay, you get the impression that it was not written for another prompt.
This essay is mostly about the author because he used value as the key focus. Look at the word count: the essay is 258 words long, yet he doesn’t name the school until word 202.
This works because he remains focused on the primary themes of nature and storytelling. In fact, if we don’t understand the primary topics in the first 200 words of your essay, we could worry, “Where is this going?”
Instead, we get the impression that the author is leading us somewhere as we read this piece. We have faith in him as a guide. So we unwind.
How do you come up with such an essay?
1. Find a way for you and the school to be completely aligned.
Hint: It’s most likely a value.
It will need some investigation. And it may be easier to do so with a smaller liberal arts college (like Bowdoin) with a distinct personality. Reed College, for example, is proud to call its students “Reedies,” even going so far as to name them a specific species, so for Reed, you might find out what being a “Reedie” means to you, then illustrate why you are unquestionably one of them.
2. Spend some time writing the article.
What exactly do I mean? A great “Why This College” essay, in my opinion, is akin to a great personal statement in that it should demonstrate:
And, because the Bowdoin essay above focuses on only one crucial and intriguing link (the relationship to place), I feel craft becomes a LOT more important. In other words, if this essay were less lovely, it would be far less great.
What exactly do I mean by beautiful? Read it out loud. Take note of terms such as “using the river as a natural learning laboratory” and “places truly are the best storytellers.” The author even makes water testing kits sound like fascinating instruments of a real-life adventurer, as necessary to the author as an explorer’s compass (which, after reading this essay, I’m certain they are)!
How did you arrive at this point? I believe you must be passionate about the subject of your writing. I also believe (if I’m being honest) that you must enjoy writing, or at least convince yourself that you do.
This method takes time. But it’s well worth it. Why? I believe this is the type of essay that can genuinely make a difference, especially at a tiny liberal arts college. I only have anecdotal evidence stories from a few admissions officers to back this up, but essays like this have tilted the scales in favor of a certain kid in some circumstances.
3. Find a means to be exposed.
This is possibly the most difficult but most important aspect. Allow me to explain:
As I previously stated, a superb “Why us?” essay should demonstrate a) meaningful and engaging questions and b) craft. But there’s a third characteristic that I believe a great personal statement should have and that a “Why us?” essay might occasionally exhibit. Vulnerability is that quality.
How does the above Bowdoin essay demonstrate a vulnerability? He lets his geekiness shine through. (By the way, my definition of a “geek” is someone with extensive knowledge in a particular field, particularly one that is not widely known.) He accomplishes this by writing freely about what he enjoys.
What makes this vulnerable? Because doing so exposes him to public scorn. (Wait, water testing? (Come on.) He succeeds, though, since he does not go too far or contain too much jargon. What is the significance of this? He entices us rather than repels us. And we’ve all encountered both types of geeks: those that entice us and those who repel us. Be the type to entice us.
Another flaw with this essay is that he mentions very few (nearly none) Bowdoin specifics. That is a risk! Was it successful? You make the call.
Could I use a hybrid approach, focusing on a major subject but yet providing a few reasons?
The answer is YES. Here is the reason:
THE HYBRID APPROACH: USE A CENTRAL THEME + INCLUDE MANY SPECIFIC REASONS THAT REFER BACK TO YOU
The human body’s most valuable asset is its hearing. They can be pimpled, freckled, mushy, bending, rounded, or pointy. Despite their variations, they all have the same goal: to listen.
Swarthmore University is all about the ears. It recognizes the value of compassionate and open discourse and how listening may be the first step toward reconciling deeply entrenched ideological disagreements.
I know I’d be in a place that values collaboration, honest discourse, ethical leadership, and creativity invested in the public good, whether I’m learning from guest lecturers at the Center for Innovation and Leadership, engaging in dialogue at the Global Health Forum, or exploring my sexuality through the Intercultural Center. Everything at Swarthmore is about making use of those cartilage appendages on the sides of your head.
My life has been defined by listening as someone who is drawn to audio and visual storytelling. At Swarthmore, I plan to build on my great relationships and the love I’ve spread by allowing others to tell their stories on my podcasts. The next stage in my listening life will be majoring in Film & Media Studies or English Literature, broadcasting at WSRN, and writing for The Review.
I would investigate how narratives have been told in the past and how they may be reinvented digitally for a new generation of ears. Swarthmore understands that global change begins with an open dialogue. I wish to be a trailblazer for new network connections. I wish to initiate those discussions. (247 characters)
Ethan’s note: If you take this method, you should look for unique offerings to the school (as in the “Why Cornell” article). If you can’t, discover reasons that are as detailed as possible and tie them back to you (like in the “Why Michigan” and “Why UPenn” essays).
Good news: even if you have no idea what you want to be when you grow up, you can still write an excellent “Why This College” essay. Some pointers:
1. Include a thesis statement that either specifies your 2-3 areas of interest or acknowledges that you are unclear about what you want to study. Consider incorporating the name of the institution in your Thesis (Example: “I’m interested in X, Y, and Z, and I believe there’s no other location for me to research these topics than the University of Wisconsin-Madison.”)
2. You can also start with a catchy hook to demonstrate your originality while also distracting from the fact that you have no idea what you want to be when you grow up (which, by the way, is also acceptable).
Here’s an excellent example to demonstrate these points:
Prompt: Johns Hopkins University was founded in 1876 in a spirit of exploration and discovery. As a result, students can pursue a multi-dimensional undergraduate experience both in and outside the classroom. Given the opportunities at Hopkins, please discuss your current interests (academic, extracurricular, personal passions, summer experiences, etc.) and how you will build upon them here. (500 words)
Ariana, in 2016,
The year is 2026. I just returned from the G20 summit, where I presented the annual report on demographic change and population stability.
Throughout your seventeen years, you have been bombarded with options: which airline seat to select? Is the correct response B or C? Is “the dress” blue and black or white and gold? However, you will soon make a decision that will enable you to harness your knowledge and use it in real life. The decision to attend Johns Hopkins.
You’ve now lived in India, the United Kingdom, and the United States, gaining multicultural experience that has impacted your views. You’re not sure what you want, but deep down, you want a convergence of ideas and fields. That is something that can and will be found at Hopkins.
The JHU Humanities Center, in particular, will provide you with a flexible approach to multidisciplinary study, which is vital because you respect the need to investigate before making a decision. This may be found at Homewood and globally through studies at the Sciences Po campus in Paris, highlighting the interconnectivity of fields such as law, finance, and urban policy.
In Model United Nations, you practiced collaboration skills by working with kids from around the country to exemplify pluralism and establish consensus. In Professors Moss and Hanchards’ Diaspora, Nation, Race, and Politics class at Hopkins, you will hone these talents and your knowledge of international affairs. The conversations, which include topics ranging from political sociology and human rights to the fall of late-nineteenth-century empires, will provide you with a better knowledge of how history shapes our perspective of today’s geopolitical concerns.
And while your internship in Senator Glazer’s office dipped your toe into the water of government and politics, JHU offers an immersive dive into this subject through their International Studies Program, including changes at the Nanjing Center in China and the Nitze School in Washington, D.C.
Locally, you can further your political experience by running for JHU Student Government Association, where you will continue to represent varied opinions and create a place for recognition and discussion.
You will also have the opportunity to continue your work with the Red Cross by joining the JHU and Chesapeake Regional chapters and giving back to the Baltimore community. And by joining the Public Health Student Forum, you will have access to speakers who have spent their whole careers in these subjects, such as Dr. Jody Olsen, former Director of the Peace Corps, and Dr. Richard Benjamin, Chief Medical Officer of the Red Cross.
All of your life experiences, from community building to understanding behavior to make decisions, have been shaped by One. Single. Choice. You would not have become an expert on global policy change without Johns Hopkins, and you would not have spoken at events like the G20 Emporium.
Yes, the world has altered significantly in the last decade. However, Hopkins acknowledges this fluidity and, in collaboration with you, Ariana, will increase the importance of integrative studies.
Love,
Ariana, in the future
P.S.: The gown is white and gold.
Finally, have you noticed how, in the end, this technique isn’t all that different from Approaches 1 and 2? The significant distinction is her Thesis, which, rather than naming a major, merely declares that she is undecided about what she wants to study. We’re fine with it, especially since she still offers a lot of explanations and relates them all back to herself.
1. Look over your essay for capital letters. Why? Because capital letters almost always indicate that you’ve mentioned something particular that the institution provides. Indeed…
2. In bold, state your reasons for attending. I did this in the essay “Why Johns Hopkins?” above. Note if you only have 1-3 items marked in bold after doing this. If this is the case, you may definitely cut some corners to make room for more reasons. This isn’t a hard and fast rule, but if you’re taking the first or second approaches I’ve discussed, 1-3 reasons per paragraph is a reasonable rule of thumb; however, if you’re taking the third way, you can do whatever you want: you could go in-depth on one very fantastic reason. But, in any case…
3. Make sure that every time you mention the school, you link it back to yourself. How did you find out? Simply go through each school reference and see if you’ve expressed why it’s significant to you, not simply in general.
Finally, here is an example of how a personal statement and “Why This College” essay might work together:
If I could only pursue one aim for the remainder of my life, it would be to take concrete steps toward gender equality. I’ve noticed a difference in how I’m treated due to my gender since I was six years old, whether it’s in sports, at mealtimes, or at social gatherings. I’ve used social entrepreneurship to combat the effects of gender bias, and now I’d like to learn more about the societal foundations that underpin these concerns.
In the College of Arts and Sciences, I intend to study Gender, Sexuality, and Women’s Studies, focusing on Feminist Studies and Global Gender and Sexuality Studies. I will explore how complex social identities such as race and gender affect economic transactions and demarcate opportunities open to minorities in Professor Kathleen Brown’s “Gender & Society” class.
In Dawn Teele’s “Sex and Power” class, I aim to further investigate the ramifications of electoral quotas and their impact on transnational women’s mobilization. Such classes will help me ensure that I am not fighting for one cause at the expense of another, and they will provide me with the knowledge and abilities needed to assess social, economic, and political processes in the real world.
Last summer, I spent a month at UPenn, living in Harnwell College House and incubating my social impact firm, Straw’d, through the Pennovation Center’s LaunchX program. MEAM Professor Jenna Shanis spoke about her work constructing beverage machines for Coca-Cola at the event. She demonstrated that the initial solution is rarely the best option and that innovation is most effective when it is iteratively pondered and cross-fertilized by giving us a basic challenge (“find a way for humans to appreciate flowers”).
Vanessa Chan, the designer of the tangle-free headphones’ Loopit,’ motivated me to produce a consumer good rather than a company in the service industry. These two professors and others who spoke have provided me with a new perspective on merging theory into practice and critical thinking into activism.
Given my interest in establishing new social enterprises, I would like to join the Penn Social Entrepreneurship Movement to learn more about economically empowering women in other nations. I will learn about the multifaceted field of social entrepreneurship and gain exposure to challenges such as food innovation and food policymaking through events such as PennSEM’s ‘Social Impact Talk Series.’
Additionally, hosting TEDxYouth@Austin events has been a vital part of my four years of high school, and I aim to continue this love through TEDxPenn by identifying and elevating women speakers from underrepresented fields.
I’ve been an artist for longer than an activist. I will learn to use design as a vehicle to fight for gender equality in the future through classes like “Photographic Thinking- a Benjamin Franklin Seminar” and “Art, Design, and Digital Culture,” as digital art is currently heavily influencing the way social movements develop momentum through media.
While at UPenn, I realized that many adolescents from nearby areas grow up in challenging socioeconomic situations, and while I explore how race and gender affect economic opportunity, I wish to empower women of color from these neighborhoods. I will collaborate with Community School Student Partnerships to offer social impact and entrepreneurship workshops in high school after-school programs.
I’ve seen directly how entrepreneurship training can empower individuals, and I wish to help girls from marginalized groups tackle the difficulties they face by training them. Joining CSSP will allow me to give back to the Philadelphia and Penn communities while also pursuing my passion for uplifting young women.
The GSWS program at UPenn is ideal for me. Its interdisciplinary training and intersectional approach would equip me with the information, mentorship, and resources I need to advance as a social justice advocate and equality champion.
That’s all there is to it. Before you plunge in, here are three techniques for tackling your “Why this college?” essay. Hopefully, these pointers will get you started.
Do you have a suggestion or a question? Have a completely different perspective on this essay? Please let me know in the comments section.
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